My Weekend Crush

Since we’re talking about gay pop this week, how about we revisit this banger? Let it serve as a reminder that unless you spell it out in the most specific of detail, straight folks will never think you are g-a-y. Because here is Jodie Foster singing in French in a variety of jaunty men’s outfits on some 1970s variety show and it still took until 2013 for straight people to realize she was gay? They should teach LGBTQ+ history AND gaydar in schools, clearly. Happy weekend, all.

Gender Fuck Thursday: Scoop Edition

I’m not what you would call an avid royal watcher. Yeah, OK, I watched some of the weddings back in the day. And Diana’s funeral. But otherwise I don’t really care what our former ruling monarchy is up to. (Though, clearly, it’s beyond immoral for them to use the sex trafficking services of their pals who are known pedophiles.) I know I didn’t watch the Prince Andrew interview that inspired “Scoop” in full – though of course I don’t live under a rock so I saw clips of the most egregious bits.

So, in theory, it would be a tough lift to get me to watch a movie about Randy Andy’s disastrous Newsnight appearance. But then they cast Gillian Anderson, Keeley Hawes and Billie Piper. So, well, I had to watch. It confirmed that, yes, Andrew and the royals are grotesquely rich, privileged people who have gotten away with everything for way too long. And, also, that Gillian, Keeley and Billie should team up more to take down bad men (even if that result was not intended from Keeley’s character).

So in honor of this trio’s good on-screen works and red carpet camaraderie, I thought I’d share all three women in excellent suits. Granted, “Scoop” is really Billie’s movie with Gillian and Keeley offering strong support. But you get to decide who wins their suit-off, since it’s a Thursday an all. (I know, throwing in Kitty Butler isn’t fair but neither is life so there’s that.)

Pop Stays Gay

I hope everyone enjoyed the glorious gay pop of Chappell Roan from earlier this week. And while I will refrain from entering the fray on “Gay Pop”-gate (oh, JoJo), I will remind everyone how important it is to keep LGBTQ+ history alive. Granted, I don’t expect our schools to start teaching about Tegan & Sara and Boy George and Dusty Springfield. But not knowing one’s history is how community becomes erased, how struggle is diminished and how hard-fought rights can be lost. Instead, let’s all strive to appreciate the evolution of queer pop and how we’ve gone from the pronoun hiding of yesteryears to out, open lyrics about gay girls getting an amen. That’s something to celebrate. So, yes, the uninformed (willfully or otherwise) who will always think they’re somehow reinventing the wheel. The rest of us will continue to enjoy the artform as it grows and progresses. And, of course, it doesn’t hurt to look back and remember some classics. I know “Son of a Preacher Man” is catchier, but we all know Dusty would be just as happy with the daughter – probably a lot happier. What, it's Hump Day. Anyway, carry on gay poppers. Carry on.

Tank Top Tuesday: Top Chef Edition

So I started watching “Top Chef” again after, well, years. I wanted to see how Kristen Kish did replacing Padma Lakshmi. Which is to say I wanted to see Kristen Kish. And so far I think her and her vests are doing just fine as the new host. I mean, no one can replace Padma Lakshmi because Padma Lakshmi. That said I am enjoying how Kristen shows up every week in her signature vest-in-lieu-of-a-top look. And when she isn’t wearing a vest, she’s wearing something sleeveless. And if she isn’t wearing something sleeveless, she’s wearing a blazer. So, truly, we are all winner here.

I’ve also been a little thrilled with how lesbian the special guest judges have been so far this season. Clea DuVall and Dominique Crenn (a.k.a. Maria Bello’s fiancée)? Thank you, whatever queer lady foodie producer is making these booking choices. Thank you. So, thoughts on this season so far? I mean, it is a Tuesday and the rules do consider vests to be acceptable variations on a tank top. Oh, and clearly I’m rooting for queer cheftestant Rasika, not that she needs my help. But, you know, Go Team Rainbow Chefs! And vests!

Music Monday: Chappell Roan

OK, well now I definitely love Chappell Roan. The singer of the lesbian situationship anthem “Casual” performed at NPR’s Tiny Desk Concert series recently and was, quite simply, a delight. From her all-female backing band to her high-camp look, she was wonderfully charismatic in the way few stars are today. She was a little weird, a little out there and all magnificent. She reminds me, in spirit, of Cyndi Lauper – and not just because of the bright red hair/wig. While their voices are clearly different, she radiates the same unconventional punk rock balladeer energy of a girl who just wants to have fun (but can also break your heart with that voice). Also like Cyndi she is unapologetically pro-female sexuality. In her case, of course, that’s queer female sexuality. Plus, she donates to NPR! What a time to be a queer lady music fan – from Brandi Carlile to boygenius to Janelle Monae to Renee Rapp to Hayley Kiyoko to Rina Sawayama and now the delicious camp/glorious joy of Chappel Roan. Happy Monday, kittens.

My Weekend Crush

I think I’ll always cheer for Kirsten Dunst. I think this is because a) she has starred in so many movies I’ve enjoyed over the years and 2) we’ve all watched her grow up in those very same movies. Acting since she was 3, a star since she was 12, she appears to be one of those rare childhood actors who wasn’t totally fucked up by the experience. Or, at the very least, has been able to grow into the person she is now. And that person seems sensible. No bullshit. In short, she seems very much to be a grown-ass woman who knows who she is, what she wants and isn’t that what all of us want in the long run?

Would she do another superhero movie? “Yes, because you get paid a lot of money, and I have two children, and I support my mother.” Does she believe in method acting? “What, am I gonna be like that with my kids when I come home? Speaking in an accent? Like, honestly, I can’t do that. It seems like something only men can afford to do.” Does she feel pressure to stay young? “I still know to this day, I’m not gonna screw up my face and look like a freak. You know what I mean? I’d rather get old and do good roles.” And about that Jonathan Glazer Oscars acceptance speech that was greeted with an open letter of rebuke? “My interpretation was he was saying genocide is bad.” Exactly. I also like that she never fixed her teeth, which clearly don’t need fixing.

Even if the projects aren’t necessarily in my wheelhouse (like I don’t know if my election year anxiety will let me sit through “Civil War”), I’m glad that Kirsten is able to work on projects she cares about at this point in her career. And it’s refreshing to watch her be herself, a grown-ass woman who is married with children, through the press tour. Granted, Kiki remains perhaps the most ardently straight-presenting actress of her generation. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. But, lest we forget, the subtext of “Bring It On” practically launched fan shipping as a concept (well, that and Eliza Dushku’s middle finger). And, well, she does look great in this suit. Happy weekend, all.

Orphan Genius

The #OrphanBlackEchoes title sequence is here.

Check out the official opening, sung by the brilliant @@julienrbaker. pic.twitter.com/M6cI1dJYH6

— Orphan Black: Echoes (@OrphanBlack) March 30, 2024

How gay will the new “Orphan Black: Echoes” series be? Well, Julien Baker of boygenius performs the theme song so…pretty gay. Also gay? Keeley Hawes (of “Tipping the Velvet” eternal adoration despite Kitty being terribly problematic) plays grown-up Kira who is married to a woman. Evelyne Brochu returns as Dr. Delphine Cormier (who per character descriptions appears married Cosima though it’s 30 years in the future so I’m not sure what anyone’s relationship status is at this point…) And of course there is Krysten Ritter as Lucy, who may or may not also be gay, but played at the very least somewhat open to the idea in “Jessica Jones.” Like I was saying, seems pretty gay to me. And they’re debuting this thing in June? Happy Clone Pride, y’all.

K-Drunk

Yesterday was Kristen Stewart’s birthday. So congratulations to our Millennial Lesbian Icon, now a wizened 34! Like if you told me 16 years ago when “Twilight” came out that one day KStew would be one of the most famous lesbians in the world I would, well, I would say that checks out because I saw her in “Panic Room” as mini Jodie Foster. So, yeah. No surprises there. Anyway, to celebrate this auspicious milestone, why not enjoy 17 minutes of Kristen day drinking, acting while drunk and lesbi-fying Seth Meyers. Truly, time well spent. Also, I hope posting this makes up for the fact that I have not been able to catch “Love Lies Bleeding” yet in theaters. I know this makes me a Bad Lesbian, but hopefully I can be forgiven and make amends by wearing a beanie and a carabiner the next time I go day drinking.

A Simple Sequel

When I heard “A Simple Favor” was getting a sequel I thought two things immediately. 1) How? and 2) Suits! Glorious, divine, immaculate suits. If you’ve seen the original – which you should because it was a fun little twisty-turny thrilled with, and this cannot be emphasized enough, EXCELLENT SUITS (see above clip) – you know it ended in a certain fairly definitive way. But I guess any friendship can be mended, even the kind that ends up sending you to prison for 20 years.

I have no idea what will happen in the sequel and how Blake Lively and Anna Kendrick’s characters manage to rekindle their, uh, whatever in the sequel. But for those curious some photos of filming hint at Blake’s Emily getting married. No, sadly, not to Anna’s Stephanie…probably. I mean they’re both holding bouquets so we can always dream. Now, we need some behind-the-scenes shots of the one or both of them in suits drinking martinis. Otherwise, what even is the point of a sequel. (They can kiss again too, please, because the suits and the kissing clearly go together…)

Music Monday: Cowboy KNTRY

Admittedly, I don’t really like country music. Wait, I take that back, I don’t really like contemporary country music. I like some of the old-timey stuff. Your Patsy Cline and your Johnny Cash and your Willie and your Dolly. I think I feel the same way about the country genre as I do about jazz. Love the classics, hate the smooth variety. But I never doubted what kind of country Beyoncé would produce. She has made modern country music that speaks to its earliest origins, and with a beat that you can dance to – which is quite something. But then would you expect anything else from perhaps the most intentional musical artist working today? I love how “Cowboy Carter” reclaims a genre overrun by the Good ‘Ol Boy Cosplayers. Like so much in this country, the deepest roots of our culture – from music to food to yes even cowboys – owes an endless debt to Black Americans. And, like so much in this country, those debts have never been properly repaid.

The reason so many people (i.e. white conservative America) resents Beyoncé is because she has used her unparalleled starpower to remind America of those debts. And that’s just not something a lot of people want to hear. But because it’s Beyoncé, they can’t just ignore it. And that just makes them mad. To which I say, good. Be mad. It won’t change the fact that Beyoncé is one of the most talented, savvy and popular artists of this generation. And speaking of that intentionality, there’s no way – NO WAY – you can interpret “II Most Wanted,” the duet between Bey and Miley Cyrus, as anything other than a lesbian love song. "I'll be your backseat baby, drivin' you crazy." Like, that is not how best friends sing about each other. So, yeah, this is gonna play at some gay wedding receptions for sure in the future. For. Sure. Happy Monday, kittens.

My Weekend (Girls) Crush

I have, quite honestly, lost count of how many times I’ve seen the Indigo Girls. I’m going on 30-plus years of fandom at this point, so hopefully you can forgive my forgetfulness. But I have to be closing in on close to a dozen times. More recently I have proven my allegiance by seeing them two consecutive prides in a row, because I’m simply that gay.

So, obviously, I’m thrilled that a new documentary will help to jog all of our collective memories about these wonder women. Amy Ray and Emily Saliers have provided the soundtrack to so many significant parts of my life. They were out there, before Melissa and before Ellen before everyone who has subsequently stepped on stage as out and proud voices. And I will forever be grateful for their music, passion and queerness. So start the music, I’m about to singalong at the top of my lungs. Join me, won’t you. Happy weekend, all.

It's Ghostime!

Now, I wouldn’t normally get excited for Spooky Season a half year out. Nor do I generally get too hyped about sequels because we all know about the law of diminishing returns. But, 26 years later, I am definitely, definitely going to see “Beetlejuice Beetlejuice.” No just because Winona Ryder is back as as Lydia Deetz and not just because Catherine O’Hara is back as Delia Deetz and not just because Jenna Ortega is joining as Astrid Deetz. It’s all those things, and the fact that I still quote parts of “Beetlejuice” a quarter century and change later. (“I am alone. I am utterly alone.” It may only be April, but I’m already planning my all-black outfit for Sept. 6.

Hell Hath No Furiosa

Really, starting with obvious Eve and Garden of Eden allusions? Sure, OK. Luckily the rest of the trailer is pure vengeance porn, and I mean that in a good way. I mean, consider her name and that Hell hath no fury and all that. So, while I still insist we see Charlize as Furiosa again (and in general dislike the make it again, but with a younger female star cliche), I am getting more excited about “Furiosa.” I just hope Anya Taylor-Joy doesn’t get upstaged by Chris Hemsworth and his prosthetic nose. We shall see.

Building Bridges

A true crime thriller with Lily Gladstone, Riley Keough and Archie Panjabi? Yeah, I’m gonna be watching that. Based on a real 1997 disappearance and death of a Canadian high school student, the trailer is taut and leans into the “Mean Girls: The Murderers” premise. Reminds me a little of “Thirteen,” but again with more murder.